UPDATE II: Desperately Seeking Immigrants Who Qualify For Welfare (In Other Words, ‘Undocumented Democrats’)



“Desperately Seeking Immigrants Who Qualify For Welfare” is the current column, now on WND. An excerpt:

“Number 69, number 69,” called an officer of the US Citizenship and Immigration Services.

Number 78, yours truly, was sitting in line at the ASC (the Application Support Center), in Washington State. I was there to renew my green card, the much-coveted US permanent residency permit.

The woman to my left was clutching note number 69. Despite having been summoned time and again, she stayed put. She did not understand English. Like her, the room was packed with applicants who were talking in tongues.

Although a longtime champion of American freedoms, I have decided, for now, against accepting US citizenship, for which a green-card holder is illegible after five years.

Uncle Sam’s foot-soldiers assault me whenever I take to the unfriendly skies. And should I leave the US, after taking the Oath of Citizenship—IRS agents will fulfill their oath of office and hunt me down.

As the chorus lyrics to that haunting rock classic by the Eagles goes, “You can check-out any time you like, but you can never leave!” In the evocative words to “Hotel California,” Americans who try “running for the door,” soon discover that they “are all just prisoners here …”

Prisoners of Uncle Sam’s device.

If he can tolerate TSA assaults as he departs the country, a US citizen who chooses to live and work overseas cannot escape the Internal Revenue Service. The United States is perhaps the only country “to tax its citizens on income earned while they’re living abroad.”

Although the government’s citizenship stamp of approval is meaningless, there are risks in rejecting it.

While a US citizen cannot be denied entry whenever he leaves the country and returns home; a green-card holder is essentially asking for permission to re-enter. This, as millions of members in a favored outlaw fraternity stroll across the southern border, giving border patrol the finger (as the other finger dials the ACLU).

Besides, have you ever heard a member of America’s low-brow glitterati and literati advocate for immigrants who are not poor, not brown, and not uneducated? I have not—with the exception of Tucker Carlson, a libertarian-leaning rightist. …”

The complete column is, “Desperately Seeking Immigrants Who Qualify For Welfare.” Read it on WND.

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UPDATE I: Jay Leno on “Undocumented Democrats”:

“And in a groundbreaking move, the Associated Press, the largest news gathering outlet in the world, will no longer use the term ‘illegal immigrant.’ That is out. No longer ‘illegal immigrant.’ They will now use the phrase ‘undocumented Democrat.’ That is the newest – ‘undocumented Democrat.’ ”

UPDATE II (4/5): About “Non-Sycophantic Libertarians,” Todd writes on WND’s Comments:

I’m with you and Tucker on the immigration issue. I don’t know if this is still the case, but it wasn’t that long ago that if you wanted to immigrate to Australia, you had to show proof that you either a) had enough assets to support yourself long term or b) possessed a
skill that was needed there. That would never happen here though..it makes too much sense.
Sometimes it takes a non-citizen to offer real perspective on what it is to be an American, not to mention shining light on some of our more dopey policies (Daniel Hannon is another who comes to mind in that regard). I actually don’t blame you at all for not taking the plunge and becoming a citizen, especially in these times (I’ve heard that even if you
renounce your citizenship the IRS could STILL come after you).
It’s nice to hear some sound perspective from a non-sycophantic libertarian (unfortunately sycophants come in all stripes, including some who cloak themselves in logic and reason). You do make remarkable sense. There’s not enough of that going around.